Generation Raise Myself

People do not fit into Generation X or Y or Z categories. I liken it to thinking that an astrological sign will give you insight into a person’s psyche. We like to stereotype and categorize and put people in little boxes of political parties or philosophical ideologies. When all is said and done, we can’t make easy judgments. Therefore, I established my own generation. Easy answers do not exist in my own self-created generation—the “Generation Raise Myself.”

Growing up in the United States, I come from a long line of DIYers. A generation of individuals. I was taught not to be co-dependent. I was taught to not count on anyone to take care of me. I am by all means successful. I can pick myself up by my bootstraps. I can work and excel. I have friends, multiple degrees, good jobs, hobbies, and social events. I have calendars filled with multiple engagements and projects. I am popular.

On paper and even social media—I am amazing.

I am part of that large expanse of people born of first world privilege who are saving the world. Helping others reach their goals and potential. What I do not know how to do is connect at the deepest level with my family or my friends. I am connected, yet only at a shallow level. Thankfully, I have technology to constantly ping and remind me that on a series of social media platforms, I am connected to many people.

“Generation Raise Myself” means I have to pack every moment with something to do because at my very core I cannot put too much time or energy into relationships for fear of being let down. Sick and need soup? I can UberEats my loved ones. Down in the dumps? I can meet you for dinner and make you laugh.

I take jobs on the other side of the country to make more money or have greater career opportunities. Why? Because I do not count on my family to take care of me. A bigger paycheck or a bigger title supersedes bonding with my nearby family or old friends. Even if I stay near family, I’m very, very busy.

I work and I work and I work some more to prove to myself that I am valuable.

Above all else, I make sure that I am too busy to focus on true and satisfying relationships Mine is a world of scattered friends—not the deep connection of family. I wonder why I do not have strong personal relationships with a significant other. Why would I? I am so well educated and financially independent that I don’t need to dig too deep into a relationship. Swipe left when any irritation comes from a relationship. I am so busy that I fail to even grieve for a series of potential relationships that were never truly nurtured. At my deepest level though, I want for those relationships to succeed. I might not say it, but I feel the sting.
Like many in “Generation Raise Myself,” I have been kinder and more supportive of friends or even friendly acquaintances, than I have been to my family.

I have gotten it all wrong.

My spiritual self, my family ties, my old family friends, and my ability to simply “be” were all to prove my worth. I pursued education without being better educated in kindness. I pursued wealth without understanding the greater value of sharing time with my loved ones.

Now I give myself permission to make a little less. I grant myself permission to connect at a more genuine level. I am still going to try to save the world. I am still going to eat, drink, and be merry with those around me.

But now that I have succeeded at “Generation Raise Myself,” I am going to add to it.

Generation Raise Myself and Raise Others—A Generation of Valuing My Family and My Loved Ones.

Maybe, just maybe, by spending more time with them. Maybe, just by being fully and totally connected with them. By sacrificing as much for them as I do for others—maybe I can start there.

I do not have to worry about an intimate personal relationship right now.

I need to be there to nurture those relationships that I have let grow weak from want of attention.

If more of us spent as much time fostering deeper relationships with our families as we did on our own pursuits, then we would all be better humans. When we are truly sacrificing for those who have sacrificed for us, we are able to become servant leaders.

I know that we have been inculcated since birth that we are granted life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I know we pack our mental United States’ Constitution in our hearts and our souls. However, we must remember that someone else granted us life. Someone else fought for our liberties. Consequently, our pursuit of happiness will be empty and hollow if our pursuits fail to make room for those who already cleared the path before. Our pursuit of happiness must be a pursuit that is shared. Pursuit of happiness for myself is human. Pursuit of happiness that is shared with my loved ones? There is no earthly measurement for that pursuit. In fact, I am pretty sure that God, Jesus, and the Holy Ghost completely, totally, and wholeheartedly approve this message.

But now I gotta go spend some time with my mom. I am pretty sure that she has a serious vacation spot in Heaven because she has been doing for her family and everyone else as long as I have known her. Although she didn't get a degree in it, I am certain that I will learn something today that they don't teach in a university.